valium & zoloft cocktail please.

i use too many q tips.
i often speak before i think, subsequently ruining someones day.
my showers are 20 minutes long & i take 3 of them a day.
im too attached to my macbook & my blackberry.
i use ranch on everything, everything.
i have no regard for anyone elses feelings.
my inability to love is beginning to interfere with my life.
if i wouldnt have smoked this morning, i would be in a bad mood.
my fear of rejection is being reaffirmed.
as hard as im trying to be a good person, it seems like ill never be one.
i have a good heart but i do & say fucked up things.
my curiousity came to fruition sunday morning.
my adhd seems to be worsening, if thats even possible.
im ridiculously underpaid, so ive stopped even caring about this job.
it feels like something is missing from my life.
music often mimics my life too closely.
ive been thinking too much.
i really need a vacation.